Thursday, October 23, 2008

Is it ever going to end?

My daughter Bella had PDD-NOS, a mild form of autism. The specialists we've met with so far fell that she will grow out of her behaviors, originally around age 6. She is now 6, has started first grade and has adjusted quite well so far. There haven't been too many outbursts or meltdowns as of late, until tonight.

See, Adam is currently not working. The construction industry is quite slow in our area right now, so I'm not sure when he'll be going back. While having him home all the time with little income is stressing me out, the kids seem to have adapted quite well and are even enjoying it. Since Bella had a minimum day today we got the bright idea to take them to the local pumpkin patch. It's not just a little patch either, it has rides, corn mazes, a pumpkin blaster, etc... Lots of fun, but pretty costly. We figure a treat is in order and decide to spend the money to take the kids out for some fun. All was well until it was time to leave. The kids are hot, tired, coming off the snow cone induced sugar high, and crabby. Nic agrees to go home, but Bella cannot possibly leave until she does the Speedway. My mom (who tagged along) and I tried to explain to her that she was too young to race the little carts, but she won't hear it. Pretty soon she is trying to run away and is screaming at the top of her lungs how she doesn't want to go home. This rolls into crying, kicking, hitting, and yells of "help me" as I try to get her under control. People are staring, I can see the whispering, and I'm trying not to start crying myself. Rather then scoop her up and carry her out, my husband just walks out to the car and leaves us to deal with it. My mom takes Nic's hand and starts walking him out, and I attempted to carry Bella to the car. The whole walk to the car was full of screaming, crying, snot flying, and lots of horrified stares. All the way home in the car she screamed how much she hated me, didn't want me for a mom, I was a witch, I was ugly, I stunk, etc.... When we got home she drew a picture for my mom that said something about killing mommy. My mom tore it up instantly and threw it away. Even as she was drifting off to sleep she was talking about wanting me to leave....

Is she ever going to get better? :(

Friday, October 17, 2008

Do I have to?

Start a blog, that is?

Apparently the evildoers at Google want me to.

Actually, it's all Sharon's fault.

See, she started a blog not too long ago and is now begging, uh, asking for comments every day. Being the good friend that I am I attempt to sign up for a Google account so that I may leave ego-boosting comments on her blog. Unfortunately, Google refused to grant me an ID unless I signed up for a blog along with it. Kind of like a gift with purchase that requires regular maintenance.

So here I am.

I always swore I wouldn't start a blog. I also swore I would never join MySpace or Facebook, and we all know how that turned out. What will you read here? Most likely cute little anecdotes about my family (more on them later), angry rants about my family, and just musings on life in general. I can't promise anything spectacular, and those who know me well won't expect anything regular, but hey, I'll give it a shot.